How to Prioritize Sex and Connection When Life Gets Busy
Summer is winding down. The lazy evenings and slower mornings are about to be replaced with school runs, sports practices, and packed schedules. When life speeds up, it’s easy for intimacy to take a back seat.
Here’s the reality: there will be weeks when you’re both tired, and sex just doesn’t happen as often as you’d like. That’s normal. What matters most is that you keep talking about how you feel and make time for each other, even if it’s just a quiet moment alone or a planned date night.
Here are ten things to keep in mind as you head into the busy season:
1. Keep sex a priority even when life gets crazy
You may not always have the energy, and that’s okay.
Instead of letting it slide completely, be intentional about finding time to connect.
Schedule it if you need to. Spontaneity is great, but consistency keeps you close.
2. Understand each other’s rhythms
Stress hits everyone differently.
Many men feel closer through sex; many women need to feel connected first.
Ask, “What would help you feel close right now?” and respond with care.
3. Treat foreplay as an all-day thing
Intimacy starts with how you treat each other outside the bedroom.
Kind words, small touches, and shared laughs build closeness.
The little things make the big moments better.
4. “Chore-play” works
A helping hand goes a long way.
When you step in to make life easier—whether it’s with kids, chores, or errands—it creates space for connection.
Feeling supported makes intimacy come more naturally.
5. Talk about what’s really going on
Unspoken needs create distance.
Be honest about how you’re feeling and listen to your spouse’s needs.
Sometimes the conversation itself is what brings you closer.
6. Stay physically and mentally faithful
When life feels scattered, guard your connection.
Keep your thoughts and your focus on each other, not on outside distractions.
Intimacy starts with where your attention goes.
7. Work on your relationship outside the bedroom
Flirt while you’re cooking dinner.
Hold hands in the car line.
Steal a moment together after the kids are asleep.
These small actions keep the spark alive when life is busy.
8. Never use sex as leverage
Sex is not a reward or a punishment.
Using it to control or manipulate erodes trust.
Keep it about connection, not negotiation.
9. Don’t wait for “someday”
Life rarely slows down on its own.
Make time for each other now, even in small ways.
A strong marriage is built one intentional choice at a time.
10. Keep it fun and pressure-free
Intimacy doesn’t have to be perfect to be good.
Laugh together, try new things, and don’t take it too seriously.
Enjoy each other, without turning it into another task on the list.
Before the busy season takes over, consider taking our relationship assessment to see how your marriage is doing. It will highlight areas that may need attention and connect you with support from our certified marriage coaches if you need it.
Life will get hectic, and that’s okay. What matters is that you stay connected. Talk about how you’re both feeling, make time for each other, and protect the closeness that makes your marriage strong.
